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BEER FAIRY
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Name Class ↑ Rarity Useful? Notes

H&K Fabarm FP6

H&K Fabarm FP6
Shotgun ★★★★★ Solid Base stats with weird skill

A shotgun from the makers of the SAT8! ...Except it's sold and marketed by HK because various reasons. It's... actually kinda so vanilla there's not many memes and I don't think any of them are really any good besides her silly Christmas outfit.

Excellent tilebuffs for running a 2SG frontline, while packing 24 armour (tied with KSG for highest base) while packing 1.3k HP at 5 links. This makes her useful regardless of everything else.

Her skill is a little questionable, but it stacks with itself multiplicatively (after armour) if 1 unit gets both (guaranteed if there's only 1 unit in the frontmost rank) and the knockback is, while not amazing, also not unwelcome. It's also on a 10second ICD so it'll rarely ever come up anyway, and her stats are solid for a frontrow tank in most typical fights with MGs.

Not as good as something like SAT8 in most situations, but not exactly something to turn away.

Remington M870

Remington M870
Shotgun ★★★★★ Niche Skill but has 5 star SG stats

Basically every weird Hell's Angels meme in 1 go, and also probably a little crazy. Sometimes called Super Longty.

Her skill is pretty much a Force Shield that works similarly to the Paradeus ones, except instead of an HOC depleting it, it slowly weakens on its own. Pretty much works the same way where at max level, you have a 1000 strength barrier that blocks out everything for a second, then it goes down by 100 every second, weakening the shield (so after 1s, it's 90% DR, after 2s it's 80%, and so on) until the shield shuts down at the 6s mark.

This is actually not bad DR at all and with timing, CAN be used to tank Golyats.

Except it has a 10s initial cooldown so AGGHHHHHHH.

It does have it's uses sometimes, but it's not your first pick because of that usually.

She does however, have typical good 5 star shotgun stats so if for some reason you lack shotguns, you can just bring her along and she wont really be bad at that.

LTLX7000

LTLX7000
Shotgun ★★★★★ Competes with SAT8 for the best shotgun to use your True Core Mask on

OBEY. Made from a less-lethal shotgun meant to give police forces more options to put down people without killing them. In G&K's case, however, she certainly helps with takedowns.

Incredibly good stats for a shotgun, good formation buffs, and her skill has the unique ability to cancel enemy buffs. These buffs include ENEMY SHIELDS (including Patroller shields) and stat buffs (including bullshit enemy evasion buffs). Her mechanics are unique, so she actually ignores normal knockback immunity. Oh, and her armor buff stacks are multiplicative. Unfortunately, the Minotaur's damage reduction is a weird thing that can't be removed, but regardless, you get so much utility from her. Even if you don't need her skill, her stats are just that good.

If you don't have her, get her from a True Core Mask or something. She's just too useful in things like later Theater events.

MAG-7

MAG-7
Shotgun ★★★★ In the dumpster with the rest of the DPS shotguns

Like every other DPS shotgun, she really doesn’t have a place in current content. A phrase commonly used around here is “a solution in search for a problem”, but the real problem with MAG-7 is that I’m not entirely sure she’s a solution either.

Her passive effect can be very nice when enemies start having 600 armor, but the times there are less than three targets are very rare. Her active skill can make her damage go sky high if it’s allowed to stack, but her being on the frontline gives her the same issues a lot of DPS SMGs have. She’ll lose links, cutting her damage by a ton. Not to mention that it takes a little while for it to ramp up. The DR afforded to her by the skill isn’t high enough to keep her healthy enough to do much.

Nambu Type 100 Submachine Gun

Nambu Type 100 Submachine Gun
Submachine Gun ★★★★★ Carried by her mod

Aka Hyaku Shiki if you're a fucking weeb.

Originally pox upon the 5 star SMG drop pool. The reserve girl holding the current record for "longest time from production to actual release" at over 2 years from being mentioned to being worked on to finally seeing light of day (SCAR doesn't count, as she was only rumours). I think she forgot how to be a t-doll with how long she was left there. She's... pretty I guess. But for the most part, her performance makes you go "Ah, that's why they lost the war."

Possibly utterly shit due to being designed by the same dude that designed possibly the least safe service pistol ever issued in the history of humans shooting each other, but this was 1 of his actually decent guns dammit.

Thankfully she got a mod that made her actually good (although RO existing means you wont use it too much). The base version however suffers from long startup and poor numbers that take way too long to get going.

Dorothy Haze

Dorothy Haze
Submachine Gun Special Versatile, especially in bed

Yes I know that's not really her name. And yes, you'd think the unit whose hands are actual guns would be a handgun, but nope, she's an SMG. MICAAAAAAAA.

She has a pretty interesting skill that reminds some of C-MS. What it is is mildly more complicated, because it comes with good AND bad sides, and allows her to be both a main tank and an off tank. As an off tank, she provides decent firepower with 100% uptime, a debuff no one cares about (-acc) and a really nice buff (constant eva up!) for the main tank, while as a main tank she has permanent Eva up, buffs acc of the same column ("vertical row") but actually makes the off tanks (or just people in the same column) a little less survivable. Skill discussed in more detail in her entry, but its fun stuff.

A problem she has though is the shape of the tiles. That lacking middle row really gets in the way, but she has enough other uses that this isn't too awful if you know what you're doing (For example, you want to buff the everloving bajeezus out of your main tank's dodge instead).

Also she buffs Rifles with her tiles too too, but this doesn't seem to come up all that much.

FN Herstal P90

FN Herstal P90
Submachine Gun ★★★★★ Strong Main Tank

Everyone knows the joke by now. If not, you've been living in a hole for the past 20 years. Now more associated with Russia (who people the gun was specifically meant to shoot at, as it was part of a PDW project that worried about armoured Russian soldiers) than with Belgium (which many people dont seem to realize is a country). Mostly noted on older servers for an utterly ABYSMAL rate which led to drama that resulted in Mica integrating official recipes into the client + promising more common true core masks. Also, surprised people by being drawn by LM7 instead of Suisai, despite being an FN product.

For performance, she's a fairly powerful dodger with a bonus offensive function, and her tiles aren't bad. In terms of sheer survival potential, she's 1 of the best, although occasionally stuff acts weird due to her shadow clones (which btw, interact WEIRDLY with the game). Of note, the shadow clones only copy the number of active remaining links, so you do want to keep as many links intact as possible for that (or not, see detailed notes). Overall, a very strong main tank candidate that is really good at her survival job.

Heckler and Koch MP7

Heckler and Koch MP7
Submachine Gun ★★★★★ Very Good High-uptime Dodge Tank

She calls you a zookeeper.

Basically packs a better version of Suomi's self-buff. Higher multpliers, lets her run faster on top, same good uptime, better base evade. HP is lower, but still really high at 198 per dummy (990 at 5 links at 100 - a pretty hefty amount still). Skill kills offensive stats but you dont care.

If you need a doll to dodge a lot for a long time, she's easily in the running for the job. (Competing with her nemesis, the P90.)

AK-74U (AKS-74U)

AK-74U (AKS-74U)
Submachine Gun ★★★★★ Niche Uses (Kinda good with AK-74M)

It's actually an AKS-74U, but the game calls her AK-74U. I know, I know. Yet another AR the game calls a subgun because...shut up.

Actually had dummy data in the client waaay before her actual release in CT, so she actually got released with a voice even on older servers. ...And that's probably the most positive thing I can say. Her tiles are OK, her skill is weird (she debuffs enemies she's attacking instead of just all of them) and while the effects are alright, the uptime is pretty awful for tanking.

Potentially useful for some bosses with manual skill use to handle certain burst windows, but the cooldown after the initial skill use is loooong so it's not exactly the best choice for long term tanking.

You may have a use for her if you're creative with it, but it's not something to just tell people to prioritize raising. As a result, her primary use is telling you wind speed and direction, unless you have AK-74M and want an AK echelon, in which case she'll be one of your SMG tanks and is actually pretty decent since AK-74M makes her skill into a passive.

RO635 Mod

RO635 Mod
Submachine Gun ★★★★★★ Cant touch this Cue Music

The first 6 star SMG, and oh boy, she deserves it. As long as the damage isn't so overwhelming that it can kill her dummies outright, she has a chance to negate the damage. The chances increase if the enemy has more debuffs or has Marks of Vengeance on them, which immediately makes her a good pair with M4. Also the Sop doll is cute and comes with weird features. This is literally Sop's fault.

AUG Para

AUG Para
Submachine Gun ★★★★★ Quirky multi-mode sub-tank

Another one of those attack/defense mode sub-tanks. Weirdly cheerful unlike her somewhat gloomy sister, though she's probably even weirder in the head. The stat changes and adjustments are applied every 0.1 seconds, so it takes a few seconds for it to take full effect. The big quirk is she gains a flat amount of stats rather than a percentage which applies after all other buffs, but ALSO after the night time accuracy penalty, which means she's about as accurate as a PEQ-equipped AR at night while she's in attack mode. It also happens after Fairy debuffs are resolved, so you can also use her to dodge or attack even while under Parachute Fairy debuffs.

SR-2

SR-2
Submachine Gun ★★★★★ Anti-Elite SMG. Usable.

Off-tank DPS that hates Elite units and provides various benefits. Her damage increase isn't stellar, but she has enough rider effects that you can probably find some use for her. Like C-MS, she can equip AP rounds. YMMV with regard to how useful that is.

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