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BEER FAIRY
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Name Class Rarity Useful? Notes

Beretta M38 Mod

Beretta M38 Mod
Submachine Gun ★★★★ Did you run out of other Mods to work on? Honestly even then

For the massive expense of bothering to Mod her and get the second skill to lvl10, you get... a weaker molotov skill than Skorpion's at lvl1. Great?

On one hand, it has the same range as the flashbang grenade. On the other hand you paid the data, exp, and core costs for a Mod. Also, the firebomb goes off the same time as a flashbang, so it's slower than normal molotovs.

Yeah, honestly I forget she even existed.

R5

R5
Assault Rifle ★★★★★ G41, but looks less like a slut

See G41's entry. Nothing new is brought to the table. Also I emphasize "looks" because her skin is kinda also slutty.

Webley Revolver

Webley Revolver
Handgun ★★★★★ Good Utility HG

At some point, G&K started running out of real guns and broke out more of the early 20th century guns.

Surprisingly, the dolls with them are actually not godawful.

If she's the leader, she gives a general buff, but whatever, most HGs do that. What makes her interesting is that if she's NOT the squad lead, she buffs the hell out of them, thus making her useful in any formation where you want to pack as much as possible into one doll's ability. Lookin' at you, M4, IWS. (And a few others)

CAR

CAR
Machine Gun ★★★ Our writers didn't care, so neither should you

There might not be anything to say about CAR. But there is definitely something to say about the Mercedes Benz E-Class Sedan. The most intelligent E-Class family of all time welcomes a powerful new member to the dynasty. The E400 Sedan model arrives this year, boasting a 3.0L V6 biturbo engine producing 329 hp and 354 lb-ft of torque — the same powertrain that currently drives its E400 Coupe, Cabriolet and 4MATIC Wagon cousins. Paired with the 9-G-TRONIC 9-Speed automatic transmission and DYNAMIC SELECT, it promises a bracingly smooth way to experience uncommon luxury. Naturally, the 2018 E400 Sedan continues the tradition of E-Class brilliance. Harmonizing advanced automotive intelligence with awe-inspiring interior design, its first-class furnished cabin puts our advanced vehicle systems right at your fingertips — even as its world-class innovations continue to push the boundaries of what's possible in the world of automotive intelligence. "Car-to-X" Communication enables the E-Class to exchange information with similarly equipped vehicles — effectively allowing it to "see" around corners and through obstacles to detect potential hazards. Driver Assistance Systems — including Active Distance Assist DISTRONIC®, Active Steering Assist and Active Lane Change Assist — feature intelligent cruise control: They help keep you between the lines, and can even help you shift between them. Inside, the E-Class cabin provides an environment of pure comfort and responsive technology. Flowing lines and vibrant screens provide a striking visual display, while touch controls, aromatherapy and tailored seats indulge all of your senses at once. It's a vehicle that demands to be driven, and more than lives up to the dream. Look for the E400 4MATIC Sedan at your Mercedes-Benz dealership this winter, with an MSRP of $58,900.

ZB-26

ZB-26
Machine Gun ★★★★★ Useful Support MG

Quite useful, but not great on her own. Her own DPS isn't especially impressive for an MG, but she can give a decent amount of extra ammo to other MGs, which can be worth it or not depending on who you pair her with, in addition to giving shotguns extra armor.

PM-9

PM-9
Submachine Gun ★★★★★ Not-exceptional secondary SMG

She's basically a 5-star hybrid-type SMG, except she's not exceptional at either role she can do. She's meant to be a sub-tank, where she does not really excel. She's fine for generic use, but not great for high-end stuff.

Avtomaticheskiy Pistolet Stechkina Mod

Avtomaticheskiy Pistolet Stechkina Mod
Handgun ★★★★★ Slight improvement, but not an especially large one

Stechkin's base version already got a pass for being usable.

Her mod gives a slight increase in her capabilities buff-wise. Her passive basically tries to turn her into a sorta-DPS to go with her buffs to allies, but TBH you'd be fine leaving it at the slight increase in power Mod 1 gives.

General Dynamics LWMMG Mod

General Dynamics LWMMG Mod
Machine Gun ★★★★ She's a better LWMMG, but now with more utility.

She actually gets some fairly hefty stat increases in her mod, with Mod 2 hitting as much FP as M2HB. The issues that 2 stars normally face (low skill values compared to higher ones, etc.) are pretty solved thanks to being upgraded to a 4 star, and it also gives her extra base ammo which helps out a lot. Overall a cheap mod to get, and honestly you get a fair bit of value off even just Mod 1.

She's pretty much an all-rounder MG, and with the Mod 2 skill, technically you're not limited to just SGs, but uh... the shield values are so low otherwise that it only really helps armored things, though I guess some people might find a use for that anyway. MATH BIT: Her Special Equip actually isn't awful, but tbh you're better off with an EOTech in most cases.

Her original form can be found here.

ACR

ACR
Assault Rifle ★★★★★ Looks good, doesn't quite live up to it. Not awful at least.

She introduces herself as Bushmaster ACR, except she fires in full auto, meaning she's actually a Remington ACR. This is kind of annoying. They should have just let her use her original name of Magpul Masada, seriously. It sounds cooler.

That aside, she has the potential to be stronger than AR-15! ...If you don't mind crippling the rest of your echelon's DPS to do so (Dusk has math figures in the expanded section).

She's honestly not bad, with 65% DPS up baseline and can get free damage stuff in if you have debuff effects already going, but she's not critical or anything. Basically suffers from "there's lots of super good ARs and she's not super good enough to displace the ones you already have."

Gr VP70

Gr VP70
Handgun ★★★ I forgot she was a thing

Suffers from "another doll does the same thing she does but better" syndrome hard, because that better doll is the 2-star Nagant revolver (which you have no excuse for not being able to get) who gets a mod to provide offense AND defense, while VP70's just defense with a +hit formation buff. Glock 17, MP443 and TEC-9 are also things. Basically, she's unremarkable and other things exist. Also IOP needs to stop experimenting with T-doll spines.

SIG-556

SIG-556
Assault Rifle ★★★★★ Tried a new thing, turned out to not really be any better than the old things

Her skill does new and interesting things. The effect is... thoroughly average DPS for a 5 star AR.

The problem is that while her initial burst is quite good, the stun puts a massive damper on things. While you can turn off her skill (it's a toggle), unlike K2, the off state isn't interesting at all, being effectively dead time for her skill. However, if you need burst in the time her skill actually works, she can put out. Just be VERY aware of her self-stun and how it can impact you. Because of that, you're likely better off using almost any other t-doll that doesn't require babysitting like she does.

Also, I hope the picture makes you feel dirty, 'cause I felt dirty having to upload that here.

Calico M950A Mod

Calico M950A Mod
Handgun ★★★★★★ Manages to somehow be even better than the original

One important thing with her mod is that she has a backwards facing tile now. This means fun times for Python fans, Nagant users, or users of any doll who prefers to be in the middle of the back row and could benefit from an attack speed buff, which happens a lot of the time. She also debuffs the enemy if the node you're fighting on is controlled by you, and buffs your attack and move speed if it isn't, but those are kind of icing on the cake for an already useful doll.

Oh, and the move speed buff is hilarious when combined with other move speed buffs, turning Hanyang Mod into a a rocket. This makes some boss fights hilariously easy as you give no fucks about their mechanics, and 60s is long enough for most battles.

You can probably leave her at Mod2, but her Mod3 equip is a suppressor equivalent with +20 evade at max. It's up to you whether that's worth it or not.

IWI X95 Micro Tavor

IWI X95 Micro Tavor
Submachine Gun ★★★★★ Good stats. Has funky specialist targeting that can be good or bad.

From the same artist that brought you Negev and IWS 2000. She's a funny SR-3MP with arguably better tiles and, more importantly, has funny targeting mechanics when her skill is active. She weeds out the weak, taking out the trash in enemy lineups. This is actually useful as fuck in boss fights with infinite trash spawns (you'll see an especially annoying case she can help with in Shattered Connexion), or if you specifically need the trash taken out for some reason. Aside from that, she's a normal direct fire DPS off-tank.

HS2000

HS2000
Handgun ★★★★★ Shields are nice. She gives shields.

The weirdo, mildly creepy sweet potato. Honestly one of Waterkuma's better designs too. All sorts of adorable and frankly, the best shields you can get. Full party, 42-point shields, with stat buffs if the shield survives. The big thing is she can shield the whole echelon unconditionally, which helps massively for certain attacks like Doppel missile swarms, and can even negate them entirely with a bit of luck, or if you're using FP debuffers. As a result, she's a vital component of many weird teams purpose-built to kill some cheese enemies.

Farm your damned boxes and get her.

El Clear

El Clear
Handgun Special Yes

Actually a pretty strong buffer. Her skill is a lie, it isn't actually random: It actually buffs allies in order of Damage Done, skipping herself. This means the top damage contributor is buffed first, then the 2nd, and so on. Once she goes through the list, she starts again from the top. This makes her fairly reliable if your comp has reliable damage. She also gives a HUGE boost with her special equipment. MAKE SURE YOU GET HER SPECIAL EQUIPMENT.

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