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Name Class Rarity ↓ Useful? Notes

Izhmash PP-19 Bizon

Izhmash PP-19 Bizon
Submachine Gun ★★★★ Usable

Not to be confused with PP-19-01. Decent stats, interesting buff tile, but like all grenade SMGs kinda superfluous.

Between Zas (same area, more damage, enemy debuff), molotovs (a lot more damage and damage over time, smaller area), and airstrikes (all the area, more damage) there's plenty of better options to sacrifice your enemies on the altar of Megumin. Can be pressed into service if you're really lacking off tank options, I guess.

Extra notes available.

KBP PP-90

KBP PP-90
Submachine Gun ★★★★ Usable

Actually has one of the highest evade ratings among the SMGs and posseses a skill with really good uptime (15/16!), but kinda eh tile buffs. So why just "usable?"... Because other SMGs exists, and does it better in every way. In addition to having other features that make it better like being able to increase damage or accuracy or evade passively, permanently, and it is very hard to recommend her knowing that something superior in every way is kinda... you know, there.

Heckler & Koch UMP45

Heckler & Koch UMP45
Submachine Gun ★★★★ Good early

Thot Twin #1

Honestly, what you should be looking for in a beginning tank SMG. Decent HP pool, good dodge, a smoke grenade that slows enemies, good aura to support an AR squad, really the standard to which you'll hold early tanks to. Overall, probably the best to have for general use until you get RO635 mod.

If you want more info on her mod, look at her mod article.

AAC Honey Badger

AAC Honey Badger
Submachine Gun ★★★★ Decent Enough

Yet another very small rifle that got classed as an SMG. Basically a 4 star SCW, but with much better tiles and less blah %s on the skill. Stats are ok, but not exceptional. Like SCW, trades some firepower for more +eva on the skill. Whether this is worth it... ehhh YMMV. Personally not, but maybe it'll help for some of you?The big thing is really the nice tiles with some extra shootiness. Not the most impressive offtank but there are worse ones and she'll get the job done for most basic applications.

She's sufficiently straight offtank that there isn't much to say

Beretta Cx4 Storm

Beretta Cx4 Storm
Submachine Gun ★★★★ Not to be confused with her actually useful relative

She seems to have forgotten her skirt or pants, and has a very interesting discussion with SOPMOD about the nature of dolls. She also likes collecting cigarette packs.

There is a reason I'd rather be talking about her setting details than her performance. In the story, she mentions she's actually part of a logistics unit instead of a combat unit, and you can see why.

Her stats are middle of the road, and the skill is actually fairly unremarkable. Uptime is worse than than Suomi or MP7, while also giving worse final numbers. Combine with not impressive HP, middling tiles and the fairly easy availability of better SMGs, and you can see why keeping her in your own logi teams is probably doing her a favour.

Pistolet-Mitrailleur de 9 mm modèle 1949 (MAT-49)

Pistolet-Mitrailleur de 9 mm modèle 1949 (MAT-49)
Submachine Gun ★★★★ She Does It For Free

4* version of JS 9 with slightly different stat spread (worse eva, basically) and awkward tiles. Can be used similarly to her, if you don't mind kiting her more to make up for the goofy positioning.

Her biggest advantage is that you will be farming 12-4E enough to get sufficient copies of her to x5 link her for free, but by the time you can reach 12-4E you should have better SMGs.

So overall… meh. Does the job, but so will others.

CF05

CF05
Submachine Gun ★★★★ Surprisingly useful "Armored" SMG

For once, an SMG that does something different. Her skill at max reduces her damage taken per hit by 15, except since it ISNT armour, it cannot be penetrated by armour-ignoring effects (like explosions) or enemy AP. So, massive multi-hit effects kinda just get shrugged off. Also, unlike shotguns, as an SMG she can dodge, so you don't mind taking ticks of 5 damage here and there.

What makes her useful while shield SMGs exist is mainly the much faster ICD.

SAF

SAF
Submachine Gun ★★★★ Failed Experiment

As a grenadier, she's fucking awful. It has less power than most grenades do, which is not helped by her shitty FP stat, and she doesn't even aim at enemies (she aims at points on the ground based on her location). This may or may not have value depending on what weird niche content might come up, but she's definitely not general use material.

Beretta M38 Mod

Beretta M38 Mod
Submachine Gun ★★★★ Did you run out of other Mods to work on? Honestly even then

For the massive expense of bothering to Mod her and get the second skill to lvl10, you get... a weaker molotov skill than Skorpion's at lvl1. Great?

On one hand, it has the same range as the flashbang grenade. On the other hand you paid the data, exp, and core costs for a Mod. Also, the firebomb goes off the same time as a flashbang, so it's slower than normal molotovs.

Yeah, honestly I forget she even existed.

AR-57

AR-57
Submachine Gun ★★★★ Weird multipurpose SMG that can buff allies

She looks like a discount STAR-chan, although it's hard to describe anything that uses a stupidly expensive round like the 5.7 as a discount anything. She has a three second long cooldown and the skill lasts for two seconds. Her big thing is that she can also buff SMGs. She can be used either a mild firepower buff or an actually not awful evasion buff, the downside of which being that getting her evasion buff to work requires moving your dolls around.

Steyr TMP

Steyr TMP
Submachine Gun ★★★ Trophy Raifu

YANDERE DA NYAAAAA

…For once, an Austrian gun that's not hilariously OP. Instead, she's a 3* IDW with lower evasion and tiles that want her in the off-tank position for which she's useless in. Even worse, she's a crazy yandere and thus a trash tier waifu.

Given that evasion tanks are niche to begin with, and RO is free, not worth bothering with.

Colt Sub-Compact Weapon (SCW)

Colt Sub-Compact Weapon (SCW)
Submachine Gun ★★★ Trophy Raifu

The absolute trophy raifu, because getting her is absolute ass, being more annoying than any other chapter exclusive. She is literally the only doll whose farm is so bad I will actually recommend autobattling rather than doing her map over and over. It's THAT bad for what you get and she isn't even worth it except for the 100% completionism.

Her tilebuffs are not great (6% Firepower, 10% RoF directly behind her), and her dodge buff is extremely blah for a 5/8. Her self-damage buff is not the worst while having surprisingly high Firepower for a 3 star SMG, but nowhere near as effective as SR3 or later, similar SMGs. Overall, a trophy raifu that you might be able to press into service if desperate enough, but I really wouldn't count on it.

Taurus MT-9

Taurus MT-9
Submachine Gun ★★★ Trophy Raifu

She's a 3 star Beretta M38, basically. Has high HP for a 3 star SMG, mediocre buff tiles and a flashbang. Unlike Beretta M38, you dont get extra copies for free.

Probably more reliable than the actual gun though, which isnt saying much, because TAURUS PRODUCT.

Micro Uzi

Micro Uzi
Submachine Gun ★★★ Her mod is good her base is not

An alright firebomber if you don't have Vector, but you won't get a shitton of free copies of her like you do with Skorpion. Slightly but not significantly better than Skorpion at actual firebombing, but has a much much shittier aura. Bullied by a lot of artists for being retarded.

Her mod makes her a lot better, rivaling if not surpassing Vector. Look at that article for more info.

Z-62

Z-62
Submachine Gun ★★★ Too Late to be useful

She actually has a decent hybrid skill and statset except she's locked behind LSC and a shit campaign grind so you'll probably have better by the time you can get her.

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